Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Meditation: Grieving

Every great loss demands that we choose life again. We need to grieve in order to do this. The pain we have not grieved over will always stand between us and life. When we don't grieve, a part of us becomes caught in the past like Lot's wife who, because she looked back, was turned into a pillar of salt. Grieving is not about forgetting. Grieving allows us to heal, to remember with love rather than pain. It is a sorting process. One by one you let go of the things that are gone and you mourn for them. One by one you take hold of the things that have become a part of who you are and build again.
~ Rachel Naomi Remen

When our spirit tells us it is time to weep, we should weep. It is part of the ritual, if you will, of putting sadness in perspective and gaining control of the situation. . . . Grief has a purpose. Grieving does not mean you are weak. It is the first step toward regaining balance and strength. Grieving is part of the tempering process.
~ Joseph M. Marshall III
I've been thinking a lot about MamaD. For those who don't know, she lost her sweet mother-in-law to cancer last week.

My heart aches for PapaD and for little Lucy who won't have the benefit of growing up under her grandmother's influence. It's hard to find the right words to express my synpathy, to offer condolence. Losing a loved one is such a difficult thing to understand. My friend, Suzanne, recently lost her father and she is clearly still grieving and coming to terms with his death. She shared a profound thought a few weeks ago that has given her a little comfort and also shed some light on some of my own personal struggles: "it takes great faith to move mountains, but sometimes it takes greater faith to accept that the mountain will not move." We pray for miracles but sometimes those miracles don't come and we are left to make sense of it all. Passing through sorrow is inevitable and I suppose ultimately strengthens us in the end and makes the sweet moments in life all the sweeter. But for now it is okay to cry. To grieve.

I will cry with you.


Anonymous said...

Wishing strength and peace to those enduring such difficult times.


Kendra said...

very nice post. it's such a tough time of year to lose someone...not that it is ever easy. my thoughts go out to them.

MJ said...

I am so sorry for her loss. Many warm thoughts and prayers her way...