Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Step by step

When the mister and I were in New York City for our honeymoon several years ago, we bought this original piece of art from a street vendor.

It features a gold heart with the phrase "step by step" laddering up the right side of the heart. I love this piece because it represents to me that love is a process that requires time and effort.

As I celebrate the one-month birthday of my first child today, I'm keeping this in mind.

I love Olive. She is a gift. She makes this adorable sighing sound after she sneezes. But I don't have a powerful bond with her yet. I didn't feel overwhelming love when I first held her in my arms.

And I don't feel guilty or embarassed to say that.

Like with other relationships, I recognize that my relationship with my daughter may take time to develop. Right now, our interactions consist mostly of the daily mundane tasks, like feeding and changing diapers in between naps. Olive has held my gaze for a few seconds and has even smiled at me several times. I'm looking forward to more of this type of interation as Olive grows more alert and spends more time awake.

I'm looking forward to falling in love with my daughter, step by step.

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